True Nakedness

My experience (almost) baring it all…

This recent full moon has seriously shown me that no matter how much I think I’m in control.. this world is still greater than I. The last few days has been so off for me. I have felt completely disconnected to everyone around me, myself, and the Earth. Even trying to do the simplest tasks have been nothing but challenging. Picking out an outfit to wear left me laying on the floor, making loud angry noises, finding something to eat resulted in an outburst of tears and an overwhelming feeling of pity for myself. Home all alone, and I am acting completely out of control.

What to do?

A good friend of mine and I had plans to have a beach day. In my state, I wasn’t sure how I was going to accomplish this… It was already mid afternoon and I was still at step 1 in my daily activities. I called him to tell him what I was going through, not really expecting him to fully understand what I was expressing.. but to my surprise he understood fully. What a lovely Universe to give me friends like this… So grateful.

He told me he was having the same issues today, I suddenly felt a little bit more love come my way. Even though I couldn’t exactly handle being in public, or in anyone’s company, I wanted to be in his. We proceeded to meet, and went out to Wreck Beach. If you are not from Vancouver, Wreck is the only beach you are free to bare all, if you so desire to. I had never been here before.

The second, and I mean the very second we got there, my inner and outer states did a complete 180. I felt at peace with all these carefree and accepting souls. I felt at home, and rejuvenated. I bought a dress as soon as we got there, from one of the vendors set up.. to me this dress symbolized a different world. I| was a different person here, I was natural here, I was just me.

I took off my dress and bared my breasts… the few nerves I had left me instantly. I could breathe. I felt inspired by everyone I was sharing this space with. Watching people walking around smiling, loving, and accepting everyone else, bodies and minds. What a fucking beautiful place. Looking into the eyes of my gorgeous friend made me smile, this is what life is about. Life is about peace, beauty, happiness, laughter, sunlight, nature, connection. I was hit with a profound realization I am in charge of all these things for myself. I do not need to succumb to anything less, I am a powerful force meant to exist in my highest form and capabilities. All those things that seemed heavy before, were now blessings along my path… bringing me to this point of change.

It became crystal clear that I must channel my creative and sexual energies to serve both others and myself. I am blessed with a beautiful body, and am surrounded by love everywhere I go. So easy it is to get lost and become weak.

I am carefree. I am pure love.

I have talents. I have two hands I can make things with. I have gifts to give to others, I am here to serve. I can live by serving. When there is passion, there is a path. I am taking the first steps towards an amazing future.

I live in a world where no limits exist. I am CAPABLE. I am FREE. Today I start living as I want to, living in my desires, and creating a world I thrive in and am in love with.

My eyes, heart, soul, mind and body are opening.

How You Spend Your Days, Is How You Spend Your Life

So about a month and a half ago I manifested myself a job that I wanted, or thought that I wanted, and while I learned just how powerful my intentions and manifestations can be, I also learned something even more valuable: the importance of staying true.

I’ve worked mostly in the service based industry throughout my working life thus far; the restaurant business to get a bit more exact. Being a vegetarian for pretty well all these years, and going vegan this last year, I’ve always had to make a sacrifice with the food I am serving, recommending (as in pretending to eat and enjoy), and surrounding myself with. I suppose it had never really bothered me, or I didn’t really think too deeply about it. I was used to being the odd one out and having to modify the crap out of everything I ordered. The place I have just started working at is a higher end restaurant, that prides themselves in the food they serve, which hey, I give them credit for and counts for something, as every other place I’ve worked at most of the staff gets sick of the food pretty fast.  But it was when I was cramming the menu in my brain, getting ready for my food test, when I realized, I don’t want any of this knowledge in my head.

Fast forward a bit… I can’t bring myself to enjoy working here. This job would be a means for me to make good money, but you know what? It’s just not worth the sacrifice. I feel like I am betraying who I am every time I go in for a shift, not to mention I’m required to wear heels for those 8 looooooong hours.

THE LESSON:

While the last few weeks have been tiring and only leaving me with achy feet, I am grateful for it all. What better way to realize the importance in how and what you spend your days doing? I have re-affirmed now that I am perfect as I am, and it is not only unnecessary, but unhealthy to try to force myself into a lifestyle and environment in which I don’t fit in.

I have a vision for myself and I am choosing today to stay true to that, keep my goals in sight, and to love the journey getting there . I am striving to be more impeccable with my word, so I will leave respectively and honestly. However, I have already begun manifesting new and more “me” opportunities. While it was never much of a concern of mine in the past, it is for me now to enjoy and love how I spend my days… and my work is naturally a large part of that.

It never feels good to lose alignment with yourself. It can cause you to feel heavy, depressed, confused, lonely and disconnected. At times I even had thoughts that there must be something wrong with me, and that I wasn’t cooperating as I should be. What nonsense! I could see that my progress and state was quickly spiraling, so I sat still, gave myself some love and positive feedback, and allowed myself to express. In a matter of minutes I had all the answers and solutions I needed. Amazing! I say “No!” to molding and doing internal “surgeries” on ourselves, and “Yes!” to some more self lovinnnnn’.

Love and Peace and Smiles,

J.

A Woman’s Essence: A Message and Poem.

She is made of earth
A fuel to fire
Part of that fire
She holds inside, and it burns.

Her fire embraces a life force
With wisdom and desire
The sparkle in her eyes
The understanding in her embrace

She walks along her path
Each one of us different
Sometimes she gets lost and
Struggles to find beauty within herself

The tears that flow
No one else sees
Held in private captivity
Each day a new beginning

Not locked in
But not quite free
She exists in a world
Obsessed with flaws and greed

Days have become personal battles
That line between too skinny
And too fat
Breasts too big, too flat

Our daughters don’t want “to be ugly”
Too scared to be themselves
Unique beauty is hard
Authenticity over-rated

A life where she thrives
A world that supports a girl
As she is, who she is
Is where I want to live.

Ladies:
Empower your feminine
She is your essence
She is your soul, your light
She is the solution of love

Love your face, love your feet
Taste your skin, watch it glow
Your breasts are life givers
Your energy needs to flow

Support your cause, your body
Be a ripple, please
Of change and balance
That our Mother Earth so badly needs.

Doses Of Energy

Lately I have found it hard finding the energy and motivation to do more than only what is necessary. On days which I don’t have work to go to, I find myself doing not much of anything. I am in a period of grieving, grieving for a soul that was part of me. As I understand the importance of letting time heal those wounds, staying at home without anything to look forward to or even anticipate hasn’t been very uplifting and at times has created even more depression.

Now I’m not meaning to sound sad, or hurt, I am still very grateful for all that is in my life. But today I decided to put things into my own hands, and begin to live happier, more energetic days again. These are the days which are self- serving. As a result, I did some brainstorming work and came up with a few important things I think is healthy, possibly necessary,  to incorporate into your life if you are finding yourself “not quite there.”

Get enough sleep. Not all of us are wired the same. Some of us can run perfectly fine at 5 or 6 hours of sleep, while others (like me) need more, I like to strive for 9 hours. Sleep is literally what rejuvenates the body. If we are running on low sleep, we are definitely going to be lacking in our energy levels. Try to set aside time before bed to give your body the transition of winding down.

Breathe deeply. Breathe in, breathe out… Full deep breaths are much more rewarding than those shallow breaths most of us do automatically. Deep conscious breathing forces oxygen into our cells, lowers blood pressure, promotes circulation and slows down our heart rate. All in which assist in creating more energy. The deeper, slower, regular and connected your breathing is, the better.

Drink lots of water. The most common cause of fatigue is dehydration. Water is the sole carrier of toxins out of our bodies coming from the air we breathe, the food we eat, and the chemicals we absorb. It also helps regulate body temperature, and carries oxygen and nutrients into our cells. It’s pretty clear to understand the importance of water when most of our body is made of the stuff! Water makes up about 85% of the brain, 80% of our blood, and 70% of our muscle. It is now recommended for women to drink 9 cups, and men to drink 13 cups (on average) daily.

Eat foods that are right for your body. Foods that are high in the B vitamins are the best for providing your body with the means to raise energy levels. Fight any food cravings that would leave you with greasy, fatty, sugary insides, and instead invest in some fruit and veggies. Good sources of vitamin B are: kale, spinach, broccoli, bananas, lentils, parsley, tomatoes as well as others. Don’t forget about berries, their color comes from anthocyanin, an antioxidant that is known to powerfully boost energy,

Take a walk. This almost always helps me. Getting outside and breathing fresh air brings the right kind of oxygen to the brain, in turn getting your blood going. Also, the vitamin D you receive from the sun (even when it’s cloudy) will also help energize and lighten your mood. The energy outside is much more refreshing and livening than that in your office, home, or workplace.

Laugh! Socializing with the right type of group/ people is very good brain stimulation. Laughing and smiling sends endorphins throughout your body. Sharing laughter doesn’t only boost your energy but also raises happiness levels, creates bonds with people, raises the immune system, and reduces stress and pain. It’s been proven that even just the act of smiling has positive effects on us.

-Love and Peace, J.

Personal Investment

I have 4 words for you: “you are worth it.” As we should all know by now: output=input, especially regarding our efforts creating our own lives. Something clicked in my mind last week. I suddenly was hit with the realization that my life will only hold, what I create and put in for myself. In order to live the life I want, I have to be the person who get’s it.

In other words, that language isn’t going to teach itself, that certificate doesn’t get earned without the time, and that milestone isn’t going to be reached without our own personal investment. If you want something then invest and believe that you can accomplish it. You will succeed only if you take the time and effort to do so. Time passes, never to be attained again and before you know it, you are making another phony list of “My New Year’s Reso’s.” It is in our best interest and power, to use the time given to us appropriately to accomplish success, progress and growth.

“Apply yourself both now and in the next life. Without effort, you cannot be prosperous. Though the land be good, you cannot have an abundant crop without cultivation.” –Plato

Recognize when you think of a new goal, or an interest, and write it down. Bring this idea to action by committing yourself, to yourself! Be your own support and encouragement, and take the time to see in yourself how talented you are. Be impeccable with your intentions, and start to generate the results you aspire to have. Make a list of the steps you need to take, and what you can do today to be closer to what you desire. Getting those gears moving will take energy, effort, focus, competence, and patience… let’s do this.

Spending as many moments as you can improving yourself you’ll see that others, as well as yourself won’t be able to help but notice the changes happening in your life and aura. You will inspire those close to you to take the necessary steps in achieving their goals; by helping yourself, you end up helping others. Spend that money to go to school, work two jobs for a long-term gain, research and take out books about things that interest you, learn how to use that sewing machine, get up an hour early to obtain a sense of peace or to go for that run you’ve said over and over “you’d do tomorrow,” make that phone call, send that message, and spend that energy. A Goddess dreams of reaching her highest potential.

-love and peace, J.

The Journey Begins Now!

So instead of sitting here for another twenty minutes, trying to figure out the perfect first sentence to express the atmosphere of my blog, I am just going to get it over with. 

ahhhh…! Feels good not to worry about that one anymore! 

It’s 5am, and as I finally am able to write, I can also look up and see the blue sky with pinkish clouds beyond my windows… what a nice morning. So let’s get to the point of this post: I have started writing here, to track, record, and share my journey that I have begun to become the Goddess of Power and Beauty that I so long to be. 

There are a few steps that I have just created for myself, in an effort to live the life that I want:

• become a yogi
• practice meditation daily, privately and in groups
• research and learn about tantric sex, and the power of connection
• embrace my inner Goddess 
• study and practice my tarot cards
• learn how to make jewellery
• learn about our Chakras and healing each one
• explore crystal and stone healing
• write more!

 yay go me….!

On a higher level than myself, 2012 is the year for women all around to embrace themselves as they are and to become everything capable to us in the positive senses… which is anything we want by the way! This is exactly why I have chosen NOW to make these changes in my life, and really start creating more awareness in what my tomorrow will be like, as well as what I will be like tomorrow. I see countless women, many being my female friends and family, struggling to be themselves and cherish what it means to actually “be a woman.” 

What does it mean to be a woman? That sounds like a fabulous question for my next post!

“If nothing changes, nothing changes.”

-love and peace, J.